Diving with pandas again


Seems ‘panda’ is the word for panda in Spanish.

I had this language lesson while preparing for my 0800 dive today. The dive shop staff was getting ready too, speaking in their usual fast Spanish, at times inserting the word “panda” into the conversation. And then laughing.

News about nutcases travels fast.

Could only mean one thing. Panda Lady was coming back for another dive. The crazy who brought a plastic bag containing two stuffed pandas on the scuba dive boat on Thursday.

Diving with Pandas Part 1

That was the least of what made her annoying. A truly terrible diver, she’s a danger to all and sundry. (I was a terrible diver back in the day, but hired an instructor so as not to torture the other paying customers on the dive boat. And I never sucked as badly as her.)

She arrived late, again. Carrying her gear and the panda bag. She first tried to board the boat assigned to Thursday’s divemaster. A good guy who suffers fools only once. He not so gently steered her to our boat.

Our divemaster, who’d been teased about the impending nightmare, looked worried. He chose pretty easy dive locations to avoid a repeat of Thursday.

As expected, Panda Lady was hopeless again in the water. Banging into everyone (twice into me), kicking up sand, sucking down the air in her tank in a nanosecond. Unfortunately for him, a newish diver from California was asked to buddy her. They were the first to the surface both times.

Hellish and yet amusing at the same time, the experience with Panda Lady ended on a positive note. She informed us she would make two more dives and then retire.

I hope that’s a promise she keeps.



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